i was on facebook when my wifeie, posted this:
for all those men who say. why buy the cow when u can get themilk for free. heres an update for you. Nowadays 80% of women are against marriage.why>? because women realize its not worth buying an entire pig just to get a lil sausage. how funny is that.

the sad and yummy story (dont choke on ur cookie)

okay so me and my mom are starving. its spring break. (whoo!!! -lift up shirt... but theres a undershirt blocking the view lol). so my mom is eating a cookie, a yummy white macadamia nut cookie. yum right. well i wanted some too, so i stole her bag and she choked on the cookie, but thats not all, Lady's and gentleman, she dropped the last piece on he floor:'( oh so sad, no? poor cookie, and my mom for missing her mouth. jk, i don't know how it happened. but that poor sad large cookie. it plummeted to the floor, and was messed up and disfigured, (not to mention the floor at the office is disgusting), then said its last good bye's as it was thrown away. such a sad story. sad but Delicious.

people of the world...

so last night was interesting. i was way too mean, i know but hey what can i say, you cant tell me you've never thought about doing something rated 'R'(dont think dirty people i mean like in slasher films) to a girl or boy you hated right. girls can be so mean, manipulative, backstabing, and two-faced, we usually dont fit with fists, but use weakness we learn over a terms of friendship. so girls are mean, dont judge, or hate, i'm just saying it as it is. about 9 out of 10 girls are mean, and for that 10% percent of you girls that arent mean, well good for you. (and dont lie cause it wont help you sleep any better at night) i know i'm mean, and i dont let anyone think any different. i'm not gonna be two-faced about it. revenge is my thing, you know, but most of the time i dont do anything. like many Tauruses we feel anger when we are pushed too far, but seeing as we are bulls, we are also short tempered. But i still hate hurting peoples feelings. many of my friends think i'm heartless, or that i dont have guilt. sometimes i dont, but i hate hurting someone, unless i'm pushed to far, then i'm all like "hey (any friend with me at the time), hold my earrings, cause i'm about to kick this girls ***" or more like vent for hours and using the words, fudge, a**, and many others. and when i'm made it only last for a couple of hours or cry, which makes me even madder. we dont cry out of sadness, but anger and resentment. i hate to cry, i feel weak and helpless and thats something i cant do. so this is to all the people who've ever really hated someone, dont feel bad they'll most likely get whats coming to them later. Xp

feel bad

i feel bad about posting the thing about my friend but it doesnt mean i dont hate her. cause i do. (hate is a strong word that shouldnt be used lightly[so says my grandma] but i cant stand her, the very sight of her makes me angry and fills me with resentment. she's gonna wake up one day, and think back on what she did and i hope that she feels bad. god i sound really mean, its just i trusted her, she was my friend, i felt bad when her dad spanked her, and i wanted the best for her. but not anymore. i really care about my friends, but once you make a fool of me or stomp on the friendship i so freely gave out i dont care anymore. i love to simply watch as you dig a deep whole so deep that you cant get out of and smile as i reach for your hand and as you reach for it i pull it away simply returning the favor. (sorry that was mean again, man i sound dark and evil). i dont open up to just anyone, my feelings are something that i dont freely give out, its like giving a fully loaded gun to a psychotic killer. i have barriers, and no one has ever reached the small gate near my true feelings, and only my mom has ever seen a peek behind that gate. so when my friend started to make a fool of me i pulled away, my mask put back on completely, never to be shone again. we might become friends again, but she will never get passed that mask again. fool me once shame on you, fool me twice shame on me, try to fool me but it'll never happen. i feel tired and sad, and when she first messed with me i felt so hurtbut the fun's about to begin. i know i'm being two faced but hey it's better then being a backstabing, un-apologizing, guilt free (i dont always have guilt either) girl who would most likely drop even her little sister to the sharks even if they could both get away. (god whats wrong with me i sound really scary, oops, to late now, what has been written in stone cant be un-shown (ha it kinda rhymed)

i hate my friend

this girl makes me so mad. we were friends and it makes me so angry when she says we are friends. i mean what kind of friend fudging for gets all about you and makes you walk with some fudging witches (that if you weren't forced to be with them you'd like them) that are her friends. or decides to hang out with you or act like your fiends when her other friends aren't around. she thinks she's all that, and then the whole enchilada and i really would like to punch her in that annoying mouth. i know it sounds mean but i wanna stick around to see her mess up her life so i can be all like 'in Ur face four, karma's a witch ain't it' (but the actual bad words there) then she orders me around like I'm her fudging lap dog that will do what ever the fudge she tells me. not to mention she lets her little bimbo friends yell at me cause i don't wanna walk with them. now they are real dense, its like cant you get it past the thick skull of yours to see that i dint like you that i feel like gouging my eyes out with my own nails so i don't have to see you, or cut off my ears so i cant hear you? but no. i have to endure it cause she's my ride home. did i mention she'll only do something when it involves her. like when i wanted to walk she didn't want to but when her friends say hey i wanna go walk she's all like yeah, shes yells at her mom, and when her dad spanked her butt with a belt, its like she thinks she's some victim but she deserved it, she snuck around with a boy who was 18, snuck out to be at his house, then told her parents that they needed to shut up, when they were worried about her. she is the reason i come home after school with a pisses off look on my face, and that i hit the wall and scream into my pillow. i wish that i had never meet her and as soon as i dont have to see her, that'll be that day that i punch her or call her on her s**t.

i feel so stupid

so there's this guy (i know what your thinking, 'theres always a guy when it comes to teenage girls') i wont say this is different from any other crush but what ever. i like him and he probably doesnt know i exist or that i'm in 2 of his classes, not to mention i'm usually loud, so thats saying something (exaggerated i know) he might know i'm there but apparently he must think life is so much better without knowing i exist. even my friends say that its better not to know me, but love me anyway. so next time he's on face book i am going to say 'hi' or not cause he scares me.(shocker, right?) i am slightly afraid of boys, but once they become my friends they are no longer boys but man-like versions of really ugly girls, (or pretty girls who have a cross dressing issues). it wasnt always like this, i use to talk to the guys i liked ,but boys suck (and they are really really , and i mean supper dense or are jerks who ignore the obvious). so now i am shy-ish but will go up to any guy on a dare (thats different). so as i said before he doesnt really know i'm there. we were in bio and i was in his group, it was dissection time, and i couldnt wait to cut open the pig (gross i know , whats wrong with me) but i got so flustered that i couldnt do it. he laughed at me a little and joked about how i looked like i was ganna faint. but after i left his group i was perfectly fine. so when i could open up a pig head, i got a little carried away and cut the eye which was juicy(it squirted on some poor girl). and now i dont know what to do. i even gave him a quarter, which i regretted because that day i needed the quarter, and we talked very little but now i'm scared to look at him. whats worst is that my ex-friend who is an ugly wanna be, drugy (long story, that is coming up later) and she talks to him. so know you see my dilemma, my sad , sad little story.